But what can I do // What can I say

This is a funny world we live in. I had not seen my friend and heroine Jessica since the past April on the way into my cuz's wedding rehearsal dinner at Olive Garden (where she worked), so since then I'd tried to stick my head in there as often as my college kid budget would allow, only I had not seen her somehow. I would call maybe once a month and get voice mail, we (Isaacs and I) had a close call about seeing her for Halloween but nothing. So Thursday night/morning I found her e-mail address and sent her a shout out and sure enough she hit me back the next AM saying how she'd recently graduated and just gotten back from France, Belgium and Spain and she planned on moving out to Colorado soon. I was way excited, so I went to visit my Grandma later that day and on the way out I went to drop off 'I Heart Huckabees' (thanks again Charisse) and put it in the Family Video box and whom should I see in the window walking back to my car. No not my Grandma! Jessica! I went back in, we talked about how her trip had been, she said that she was going to Colorado because "It is not Michigan" and I talked about the Shannon and other things bouncing around the spaces of my head. Invaluable advise as always. I forgot how much I missed her. (sigh) I just came back from "The Club" with Isaacs for his friend's b-day party (takes off smoke poisoned longsleeve dress shirt...try and control yourself ladies. ha), get your uncomfortableness on. Get your High School reunion on also, which is great when you forget names like it's your job....blah! Watching everybody "Drop it like it's hawt" made me want to a.) open my own retro/IDM (Intelligent Dance Music, like 'Postal Service') club someplace and b.) play Kraftwerk 'The Model' at least twice. I'm still thinking about Jessica now though and was even then. Man she has been such a wonderful influence on my life (even as she says she's been probably more a negative than positive, classic), it makes me even more angry for the whole "Push everyone I can away from me, I'm contagious of failure/save yourselves" phase that was me in 2004. And I was thinking of that at the stop light on Clintonville and Walton at 3:00 AM last night when Nellie McKay's 'Really' came in, and how she can make a song about someone who is indifferent, mostly not caring and resigned and it feels like a hopeful, positively uplifting anthem. Part of how Jessica makes me feel in an opposite way, for her few self-professed flaws, she's a perfect person/friend/mentor/ to me and will always be no matter what adventures I have and what new places love & life take me to. Really.